Summer 2019 - many changes in life

Summer 2019 started with an unusual thunderstorm in Carmel.   Have to cancel the end of spring BBQ party at home.

Many changes in life.

• First summer without kids at home, JJ is going to intern with a non profit law firm that help immigrants in SF, DD will work for a real estate investment firm in L.A.
• Mom and Dad’s health is going downhill quickly.  They no longer can live or support themselves.  Without a clear direction from them, we are doing our best.  Huang is exhausted, Hong is taking long leave to take care of them for two months.  I am flying back and forth.
• Big decision to retire from Monterey Bay.  The mission and tasks at the campus defined my career over the last twenty some years.  I am known in Monterey area as the professor and director of computer science.  While since 2015, I have eased out of the position, it is still a big change for me not being the full professor that everyone know.  I felt sad to not having the classroom experience any more, but over the last few years, I already felt it is about time for me to leave.  Over the years, between being a nice guy everyone like to a task master pushing everyone to work hard, I chose the later.  I believe achievement and success is more important then being liked.  As Marcivelli stated in “Prince”, being loved and feared are both desireable, but if a leader has to choose one, choose fear.  He also stated that a leader need to decide when to break rules and be responsible for it.  Over the last twenty years, I am proud of the success we had in the school. We started innovative programs, grew from 100 to over a thousand, get a new building, getting multimillion dollar grands
• Body start to weaken, during a tennis game last Sunday, my right knee start to hurt again.  I limped all week.  Does not bother my work but depressed my spirit.

Traveling Poet

That’s really what I want to do :)

Traveling to different new places and put the fantastic stories that have touched me to poet and novels. - war, tears, laughters, hate, triumph, failure, life, death, and most of all, love.

I hope I can do it before I am too old and fail.

Continue to learn, and re-learn - tennis forehand

Had a good tennis game this morning.  To me, winning is not that important, but winning the set still lifted my spirit a little.  Riding my bike back home under the clear blue Carmel sky.  For a short morning, life is peaceful and rewarding.

Practiced to keep my head still on my forehand and focus on the ball hitting the sweet spot of the racket.  I often mis-hit my forehand shots, now I know it is most because I look at the target instead of the ball.  Checked upon how Federrer do it, with his eyes fixed on the ball thru contact, I learned and practiced it.  Very happy.

Working 14 hours a day - a curse of a blessing

Over the last 20 some years, I've worked about 12-14 hours a day.  While the required work is probably less than 6.  When I was young, I sneered at the workaholics and now I've become one.  The days, weeks, months and years become a race,  on a race track - pushing hard and drive at a furious speed to pass others to gain fame and fortune - without looking at the side window and enjoy the scenery and the people.  All in a circle.

Even though I am leaving MB, I have accumulated so many future projects that I will be busier than ever.  The modest fame and fortune are meaningless to me, yet I can't stop going full speed at 14 hours a day.

Is it a blessing or a curse? I am just too busy to find out.  Alas.