80 hours a week!!

Putting 70 hours a week is becoming a norm since 2009.  Some weeks I have to put in 80 hours.  40 hours to put bread on the table, 40 to build a dream.  Occasionally I can escape to do something different.  Visit Ventana Inn at big sur certainly an pleasant experience.

Is working hard worth it?  I am a believer of

"Both achievement and happiness are desirable,  if one put most effort into the former, both might be achieved, into the later, both will be lost"

Enjoy reading

Drove to Big Sur and sit in the middle of Big Sur creek and enjoyed a hour of reading.  Having spent too much time on emails, blogs, news, magazines, it is a treat to read books.  Also decided to spend an hour per night on books while listening to piano.  Can do about 20-30 pages per night, so far, finished the "Startup Weekend" and half of "Where good ideas come from".  With this pace, I can do 2 books per months, that is 24 books a year.  Yahoo.

Raider's March

On a gloomy Sat morning, driving toward CU.  I put on two of my favorite music on the way, both by John William.  Schinder's list saddens me so much, especially played by Sifei,  I felt I want to turn around, find a dark corner and weep.  So many twists and turns in life are out of our control.  We all are so helpless, so meaningless, so desperate and so sad.  Why do we struggle and strife so hard when all are in vain....   But, but, wait, wait...   Sun is out, skys clear up and boom! the Raider's March is here to rescue me,  The tune is so bright and up-lifting it is almost comical.  Thanks to John William, our hero goes on!  Resolve in his eyes, scar on this chest, dangers are lurking, people's warnings circle him "don't go there" "you should not and cannot do that", "too dangerous".  He lightly touch his sword, smile and turn towards the dragons' nest....

Attending a WASC conference near Irvine.  The talk was well received, but after the conference, I was surprised that my mood is low.  Drove around UC Irvine, saw the alma mater changed over the last 15 years.  Went to a Taiwanese restaurant call cafe 302, it is packed so I have to get a burger from the near by Carl's jr.  The burger is fine but I felt disappointed.  Try to find something interesting to do, found out I don't want to do anything but come back to the hotel room and study and work on emails.  Depressed.  The never ending emails frustrated me, yet I felt compelled to do it.  Maybe I should change my habit and limited my work to the working hours.

Counting blessings

After a long road trip by myself to Southern California over the weekend to give a talk to 600 admitted students and their parents and to participate the very first alumni association mixture in Long Beach, I arrive back to Monterey after mid night on Sat.  The talk was well-received, talking to alums were pleasant and I did find time to visti Bowers Museum and had a fantastic lunch. Felt tired on Sunday, I slept much longer and had a very low energy.  It was hard to drag myself to office on Monday morning, so many tasks waiting to be done and many decisions to be made.  I felt deflated.

Walking off the parking lot, I tried to boost my morale by counting my blessings, the rewarding work, caring people around me, comfortable life-style, enviable location to work, live and play.  There is little to complain. Try to follow the suggestions by one of the Harvard Business Review talk: have enough sleep, prioritize the time so the most important tasks are done, exercise and eat well.  Life can be pleasant and productive if one has the long term vision and day-to-day discipline.  Well, I do have those, so MOVE ON and seize the day!

Intoxicated with work

Often I drove to CALMAT in the break of dawn, the mist of Monterey Bay invigorated me on the 75-mile journey.  I started greeting all the colleagues right after I arrive, start a series of meetings, some arranged long time ago, some Catherine put in a few minutes while she can find a spot. Students, faculty, managers, officials, partners, job seekers, and sponsors. Typically the few moments of back-to-back meetings overwhelmed me, I have to think hard to recall who is the person yakking away in front me with the total believe that I know the complete content. I walked around the facility to make sure everything is OK and everyone is taken care of.  At lunch, I took a quick walk to the little primitive convenience store close the bus station, had a cheap one dollar coffee and smell some downtown silicon valley air.  The focus of the day usually is my lecture.  Trying to give the audience my hundred and ten percent, at seven pm, I was completed drained and exhausted after twelves hours of non-stop action.  On the way home, I often feel intoxicated, almost the same sensation as ten shots of vodka. It is startling, yet devilish enjoyable, that the work has this intriguing effect on me.   After all these years, I start to be grateful about my work.  I guess I am very fortunate to find a job that is engaging, enjoyable and even intoxicating.

Midnight in Paris, and also in Taipei?

Watched Midnight in Paris.  Nice to see all the streets, buildings, gardens and people of Paris, which left a such etched memories in me when I visit Paris and Prague in 2009.  The movie, by Woody Allen, is amusing.  Via the words of the great authors of the by-gone years, Hemingway said, "As long as the story is honest talked about courage under pressure, it will be a good novel."  How true.  The love theme by Cole Porter "Let's do it" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WpaE1zhFXXk , is especially alluring with the warm, fussing lighting used in the movie with old paris in the background.

Of the many dreams I have, living in an artists-centric community and produce poems, novels, photographic, painting, is one that I might just try sometime, maybe in Taipei, or San Francisco, or Beijing, or New York, or just in Carmel....

Challenges and Eternal Optimism

Troubles everywhere. Bought a Seaside property at low price but condition is bad.  New roof, stove, windows.  Stock dropped significant because of Europe debt crisis, venture is over budget and running short of cash reserve. Key employee is demanding higher salary. New master program at Monterey Bay is about to start but no funding or support from the state government.  Collaboration with China is promising but still facing storming water.  Young brother is moving to Silicon Valley.  To do list growing fast...

But maybe because the cold crisp air, or the new leather jacket, or precisely because of all the challenges, I felt energized and in high spirit today.

The eternal optimism is a blessing and a curse.  It is contagious, it boost the morale of the people around me.  It turns the impossibles to possibles.  It makes me exhausted often but waking up every morning asking for more.

Move forward and seize the day.  Since not many have left, might as well make it exiting!

Spending time helping the new univ

New office, "Faculty Room" in the startup university, where I spent many Saturday preparing and reflection how to make my lecture as engaging and effective as possible.  Of course, some time I even infuse a little bit of humor, since my class is at the end of Sat afternoon, most students are tired.

Helping the new university is exciting but can be controversial, since it is not accredited yet.  However, I remember my early days at the CSU, before it was accredited,  so many people, including other universities, were willing to help out.  I felt it is my obligation to help other young colleges and universities.

The room is bare but comfortable.  On the way to San Jose, I often treat myself a luxury item: Peet's Coffee, extra hot venti Macchiato with soy milk, the will sustain my work to the whole day, since I usually have meeting during lunch hours.

The door opens to "Monterey Classroom", which is the large classroom in the San Jose campus.  It is scheduled every weekend, so I have to close the door.  It felt good to occasionally hear students laughter from the classroom.

I stay in the faculty room, still 3:00 PM, teach my class in the Monterey Room till about 5:30 PM.  At the end of the class, I often get so excited that I can not sit down and have to walk around the block.

Overall, a bare room, simple furniture, provide me a quiet corner in the hectic Saturday at the new university.

Busy academic rhythm

During the summer, days are filled with travel, summer Programs, friends and relatives. It was hard to imagine how to get back to the 14 hours work days. Now it is in the middle of the busy semester, classes, breakfast updates, ITCD meetings, iied meetings, faculty reviews, fund raising, lectures, emails, many articles to write... It is hard to imagine how do ease into winter break. I enjoy the rhythm of academia, even often it drives me crazy.

Has been sitting next to Yuan and Fang for the last five years listening and coaching them every night.  Enjoyed the music, their talent and the precious time together. From twinkle twinkle little stars to Chopin Waltz e-minor.  From humid summer, to bitter cold winter.  No more.  So sad, so sad.
Have to give up something along the years, swimming, cello, tennis.  Each time is hard, but this one is the hardest.